Forever With Me
by monkaholic
Summary: GIRL WITH A PEARL EARRING Vermeer's thoughts after Griet leaves.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note: **This is based on the film version of Girl With a Pearl Earring. I may end up basing it on a few bits from the book too, but this chapter is just looking at the end of the movie. Feedback would be very much appreciated! I hope you enjoy it!

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I heard her crying on the other side of the door. I wanted to hold her, tell her everything was all right, but I knew that I couldn't. Whatever we had between us was over, and now she was leaving. There was no point in stirring up the emotions by seeing her one last time. Griet must have felt the same way. I heard her cries getting softer and the sound of her footsteps heading away from the door. Suddenly my eyes started to sting from the tears that were forming. I took a deep breath, wiped the tears away viciously, and looked out the window. I waited, hoping to catch a glimpse of her as she left my life forever.

Finally my eyes caught sight of her walking quickly away from the house. She was shaking a bit, but she never faltered in her steps. Not once did she look back over her shoulder. She never knew that I was watching. I felt a pain in my chest and an emptiness in my stomach as I finally admitted to myself that I wouldn't get to see her every day, that I wouldn't get to share my art with her every day, that I wouldn't feel her warmth next to me as I mix colors every day, that I wouldn't get to talk with her every day. She was my salvation in this house, the one person who understood the world that I live in. And now she was gone.

I closed the shutters and put my paints away. I opened the door to leave the studio, but something made me stop for a moment. I looked at the chair where Griet had sat when she posed for the painting and I could see her looking back at me with those innocent, engaging eyes. I closed my eyes and breathed in, then I turned and walked out of the room, feeling the air leaving my lungs as I locked the door behind me. I realized then that a part of her would always be with me, just as she had taken a part of me with her when she left.


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's Note:** Thanks so much for the reviews, I really appreciate it! I hope you enjoy this chapter!

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I lay in bed that night thinking only of her. Of the unsatisfied passion that was aching within every bone of my body. My thoughts were suddenly interrupted by the loud snore of the pregnant woman that was lying next to me. I turned my head to look at her and I felt a pang of guilt. She was my wife, my family, and yet all I could think about was Griet. I knew it was selfish, but her memory was haunting my every waking moment. Those lips. If only I had gotten a taste of those beautiful, luscious lips. And her hair. Even though I had only seen her with her hair exposed for a very brief moment, I couldn't picture her any other way. I longed to touch that hair; my fingers yearned to dive into every wave of it. 

My wife rolled over and clung to my chest, nuzzling her head under my chin. I wrapped an arm around her and tried to remember what made us marry each other in the first place. Her beauty and my impulsive youthfulness were to blame, I suppose. I was always a romantic, being ruled by what ever emotion I was feeling at the moment. Don't misunderstand me, I love my wife very much, but even from the beginning there was always something missing with her. We've always had passion enough, but companionship seemed to be our weakness. She was always bothered about some trivial thing or another and always tried to make me listen about it, but I preferred to be alone in my studio. Away from the common world, away from her and the children, I was perfectly content with just a paintbrush and my thoughts. But then Griet came, and now I can't bear to go in there without her.

I sighed, kissed my wife on the forehead, and closed my eyes, drifting off into a peaceful sleep where Griet was mine in every dream.


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's Note:** Thanks again for the reviews, I really appreciate it! Here's part 3, I hope you enjoy it!

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"We need another painting, Johannes," barked Maria Thins. "It's been far too long since you've had your last commission. With another baby on the way we need the money."

My face turned into a grimace and I sighed hopelessly. I hated doing paintings for money, it ruined the point. Art was supposed to be spontaneous and truthful, but when money is involved a subject is forced upon me and I'm rushed to finish it. There are the exceptions, of course. There are those brief occasions where my greatest masterpieces have come from a commission, but they turn out masterpieces because I had the freedom to see it my way. The painting of Griet, for instance, is perhaps my greatest work to date.

"Johannes? Johannes, are you listening to me? We need that money. Meet with Van Ruijven this afternoon," Maria Thins said, looking into my eyes sternly to get her point across. I nodded my head and looked away as she left the room.

Van Ruijven. Hmph! My hate for that wretched man has grown even more since the day that Griet left. It was his fault that I lost her! Yet, without him, my greatest painting may never have been made. I grimaced again at the thought that I might actually be indebted to that monster. I tapped my fingers on the desk, desperately trying to think of a way of avoiding Van Ruijven's help, but there was nothing else to be done. He was my only patron.

I got up, walked to the front door, put on my cloak and hat, and set off towards Van Ruijven's. When I entered Market Town, however, my pace became much slower. I looked all around me, searching the stalls for a sight of Griet. Deep down I didn't really think that she would be there, and even if she was I wouldn't know where to look. I had heard nothing of her after she left. I didn't know where she went or if she got another job, but it was still possible that she could be there. As I passed one of the butcher stalls I heard her voice. I immediately turned her way, but luckily she hadn't spotted me. I ducked down beside another stall so that she wouldn't be able to see me. I watched her wait on the customers, cutting the meat very precisely and then handing it over with a smile. Finally the line of customers disappeared and she had some time to herself. I had the sudden urge to jump up and walk over to her, but just as I was about to satisfy that urge, I saw _him_. The butcher's son. He brushed against Griet as he walked by her, said something to her with a menacing look, and then she…she grabbed his head and pulled him down into a passionate kiss. Then they shared a look that I have only known newly weds to share.

My breath caught in my throat and I felt as if my heart was about to burst. I had to get out of there, quick. When I was sure she wasn't looking I jumped up from my hiding place and bolted as far away from Griet and her new husband as my feet could carry me.


	4. Chapter 4

**Author's Note:** Thanks so much to Greenleaf, it's so sweet of you to keep reviewing my story! I am so glad that you're enjoying it! Here's hoping that you like this one too.

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I sat at the bar trying to drink her memory away. I kept seeing her kissing him over and over again in my head. And then my mind naturally wandered into their bedroom. How he must delight in having her every night! I took another swig of the whiskey as I imagined their bodies intertwined, his fingers delighting in the pleasure of her beautiful hair, and her giggling at the sweet nothings that he whispers in her ear. 

"Give me another one!" I shouted at the bartender as I slammed my shot glass down. No matter how much whiskey I poured down my throat, I could still see her. Everything else became blurred, but her face was crystal clear in my mind. I felt myself starting to wobble on the bar stool, and then everything faded to black.

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"Sir?" I heard a soft voice say. "Sir, wake up! You need to wake up!" Then I felt a sharp pain as somebody slapped me on my cheek. I immediately opened my eyes and tried to sit up, but the god-awful, throbbing pain in my head sent me back down to the ground at once. As I lay on my side moaning in pain and holding my head, I heard the voice again. "Sir? Sir, are you okay?"

I know that voice. I laid flat on my back and wiped the sleep from my eyes, but as I looked up at her I was blinded by the morning sun. I lifted my hand up over my eyes to shade them, and the girl finally came into focus. It was her. I couldn't believe it! It was my precious Griet.

"Are you okay?" she asked again. She held out her hand to help me to my feet. As our skin made contact I was suddenly awakened from my hangover. I felt a tingle move down my spine at the warmth of her hand. I was reluctant to let go, but she forcefully pulled her hand from mine, and the regret showed on my face. "What are you doing here, sir? This is a long way from home."

I gazed at our surroundings and gave her a half smile. "I was about to ask you the same question," I said, staring at every feature of her wonderful face.

She blushed at my fascination with her and looked down. "I was on my way to visit my brother. This was the closest to town that he could come," she moved her eyes to my face and saw the question in my eyes, so she added, "I'm sorry to say that his past indiscretions have made it difficult for him to return home. It's a treat that he has at least come this far."

I nodded my head, still smiling, my eyes never leaving her face. She looked down again and said, "Well, now that I know that you're okay, I really must be going. Franz is waiting."

As she walked past me I grabbed her arm. "Griet!"

She looked at me with alarm and said, "What? What is it, sir?"

I stared into those glorious eyes and became intoxicated with her wonderful smell. My heart started pounding against my chest, and my breathing got faster. I pulled her closer to me until our faces were almost touching, and then I leaned in and touched my lips to hers. It was a soft, tender kiss at first, but it grew deeper with each passing second as our passion was able to be released at last.


	5. Chapter 5

**Author's Note:** This chapter is short, but it felt right to end it where I did. I hope you like it!

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I felt her wrap her arms around my waist to pull me deeper into the kiss. My hands began to wander. They moved down from her back to caress her bottom, then one of them left her bottom and went back up to rub her back, then to the front to explore her bosom. I felt her hands wander as well and I got excited at her touch. Then, my hand that was still enjoying the pleasures of her bottom decided to move up to her neck, and then it crept up into her cap to take a dive into that splendid hair. She pulled my hand down and pushed me away immediately.

"Griet…" I moaned, trying to pull her back into the kiss, but she pushed me away again and looked at me with tears in her eyes. She began stepping backwards and shaking her head. "Griet…" I said again, but this time it was with despair.

"No," she said, "I cannot do this sir… it's wrong."

I swallowed the lump that was forming in my throat and said, "I know. But that does not stop it from feeling right."

She let out a weak laugh, gazed into my eyes one last time, and said, "Goodbye, sir." She turned around and headed off to her destination where her brother was waiting.

As I watched her leave me for the second time I could not prevent the tears from flowing down my face. I leaned against the wall of the ally once she was out of sight. I covered my face with my hands and fell down to the ground sobbing. I had finally experienced a moment of total happiness. Why did it have to end? It killed me to know that Griet existed in this world, but I was never to have her.


	6. Chapter 6

**Author's Note:** Thanks so much again for the reviews, guys, I really appreciate it! Here's a little chapter to tide you over till the next one. I hope you enjoy it!

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It had been two years since Griet and I shared that passionate kiss in the alley way behind the pub. I would pass her in the street on my way to the inn every now and then, but she would always hide her face from me. I purposely brushed against her a few times, and I could feel her look back at me, but I dared not to look back at her. I passed on like I hadn't noticed, like she was a stranger to me. She had no idea how much I was hurting inside.

Sometimes on my way home from the inn, I would stop in Market Town and hide myself in the shadows so that I could admire Griet at work in her butcher stall. She always looked so radient with the evening sun gleaming down on her, wiping the sweat from her brow and rythmically chopping at raw meat. As time went on, she no longer shared so many smiles with her husband, and never again did she kiss him in public. I suppose the newness of their marriage had worn off, and now they were just trying to survive.

After that kiss with Griet, I was finally able to get back in the studio. My escape from the pain was to paint. The fact that her memory lingered most in the studio was almost a comfort. A piece of her still existed with me whenever I painted. I could see her standing next to me admiring my work. I could hear her voice innocently asking about my reasons for putting something into the picture. I could feel her next to me as I mixed the colors. She was always with me.


End file.
